We tend to think of procrastination as something we do with dreaded tasks — paying bills, cleaning, or finishing work. But psychologists point out that we also procrastinate on joy, delaying the very activities that should lift us up, like reconnecting with a friend or going back to a favorite restaurant.
A recent study published in PNAS Nexus by Ed O’Brien, associate professor of behavioral science at the University of Chicago Booth School of Business, reveals that the longer people delay enjoyable experiences, the more likely they are to continue postponing them. According to O’Brien, this happens because we build up “psychological drama” around the moment, wanting it to feel special enough to be worth the wait.
Why we delay the things that make us happy
Researchers found that we often skip enjoyable activities not because they are costly or difficult, but because we want to maximize the sense of occasion. O’Brien explains that people expect these moments to feel momentous — a return visit to a beloved restaurant shouldn’t just happen “on a random Tuesday,” for example. Ironically, this mindset leads to missed chances for immediate joy.
The pandemic provided a natural setting for observing this behavior. When social activities paused, researchers asked hundreds of adults how quickly they returned to them once they felt safe. Those who had waited the longest before resuming, surprisingly, tended to delay even further, holding out for the “perfect” occasion.
The same pattern appeared in experiments about reconnecting with friends. Participants with longer gaps in communication frequently avoided reaching out, choosing instead to do something mundane. Afterward, many reported lower happiness, highlighting the immediate cost of delaying joy.
Even when social closeness and other factors were controlled, people persisted in waiting, showing that procrastination applies as much to fun as to chores. Psychologists suggest that perfectionism and the pressure to match the “right” occasion can worsen this tendency. At times, people convince themselves that they will feel more prepared, rested, or motivated in the future, even though the research shows that waiting usually produces the opposite effect.
How to stop procrastinating on joy
Experts note that recognizing the trap is the first step. Becoming aware of the urge to delay enjoyable moments can help break the cycle before it starts.
They also recommend lowering friction. Simple reminders or planning tools can make it easier to choose fun at the moment rather than postponing it. Scheduling enjoyable activities — just like appointments or deadlines — can prevent them from slipping away. Building rituals around small joys, such as a weekly call with a friend or a monthly dinner out, can also help lock them into everyday life.
Another key shift is mindset. O’Brien’s research shows that reframing what counts as special can make a difference. Instead of waiting for a perfect future moment, people can view any day as an opportunity to create meaning. As O’Brien put it, “You can make any random Tuesday feel extra special if you really think about it.”
Ultimately, the study highlights a paradox: in trying to preserve joy for the “right” moment, we risk missing out on joy altogether. By treating everyday opportunities as worthy, we can finally stop putting happiness on hold.
