What do the happiest people have in common? Arthur Brooks, Harvard professor and expert on happiness, says one habit stands out: they stay close to their families. It’s not the only factor that shapes lasting happiness, but it consistently shows up among those who feel most fulfilled.
His research highlights that family ties are more than a social tradition—they’re a core element of human well-being. Here, we’ll look at why closeness to family plays such a powerful role in happiness and what you can do if family isn’t an option or if those relationships feel complicated.
Why family connections are so important
Those who foster strong family bonds tend to report higher levels of life satisfaction and resilience. Family members provide a kind of emotional safety net, offering support in times of stress and sharing joy in moments of success. Even when disagreements arise, the sense of belonging and continuity that comes from family ties helps people feel grounded.
The reason this habit is so powerful is that it combines emotional intimacy with practical support. Family is usually the group that sees us as we are, beyond roles like job titles or social status. Being accepted in that space reduces loneliness and builds confidence. This kind of connection isn’t about perfect harmony but about being present for one another.
This insight lines up with decades of psychological research showing that close relationships are the strongest predictor of long-term happiness. Having people you can count on buffers against depression, anxiety, and the everyday stressors of life.
What to do if family isn’t an option
Not everyone has supportive relatives nearby, and some people may find family relationships too strained to offer real comfort. That doesn’t mean happiness is out of reach. The benefits of family can be mirrored through other kinds of connections. Here are some ways to build that same foundation:
- Cultivate true friendships. Real friends are the ones who stick around when things get tough. Investing time and energy into these relationships creates bonds that can feel just as strong as family.
- Join a community. Whether it’s a faith group, a volunteer organization, or a local club, communities offer structure, belonging, and shared purpose.
- Mentor or be mentored. Intergenerational relationships—helping younger people grow or learning from those with more life experience—can provide meaning and mutual support.
- Adopt rituals of connection. Regular phone calls, shared meals, or even online meetups create consistency and help strengthen ties, whether with relatives or chosen friends.
- Practice self-reflection. Knowing yourself and being honest about your emotions builds resilience. Ancient thinkers like Seneca saw self-knowledge as the foundation of a meaningful life.
Choosing to invest in these relationships can transform isolation into connection. This way, happiness is a reflection of building a circle of trust, loyalty, and care. Brooks reminds us that happiness shouldn’t be seen as a final destination but as a compass guiding our choices. Whether through family, friends, or community, the habit of nurturing close, supportive relationships is what makes life not just easier to bear but deeply fulfilling.